Happiness, Human, Life, Peace, Poetry from The Well, Time

Happiness Forecasted

Diets, mantras, bedtimes,

doses, meditations —

happiness has been forecasted.

A million rules later

one unruly mind, one quarrelsome heart

refuse to be coaxed from orbit.

After all,

what can overpower their chemical dance?

Well, a sunny day, a groaning violin,

or a tender smile.A million rules laterand I’m still on trackto surrender to the twisting winds.Happiness Forecasted

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Poetry from The Well, Writing

I turn to the sun

From Gizmag.com

I turn to the sun

wishing to be still and patient

as a candle that holds

packed in its weight

spirals and spirals

of perfumed air

that long to dance skyward

 

Oh to be lit

quick and easy

as the candle’s wick

 

To be cleanly contained

in a pretty jar

ready to cast a glow

across any wall

 

Instead I seep sideways

a puddle freshly chilled

after late summer’s rain

 

At least I’ve caught

this greasy rainbow

to steal light from the sun

 

It ripples in your eyes

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Poetry from The Well

whether here or there

I followed you

then I hid you

 

kept my back near the outskirts

by all the ways out

 

Couldn’t stick to the speed

of your orbit

 

so here I go – floating off –

            planet alone –

farther away – I mourn –

            what it means to be inside –

your hive –

 

from here I hear

happy laughter gushing

like a waterfall

 

whether here or there

 

it remains to be seen

 

if I remain to be seen

Otaki 037

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Poetry from The Well

Résumé

Opotoki 003

 

I wait in the flesh around the skeleton.

I tread between sturdy strings of islands.

I dance beneath beads that glitter

turning muscles that turn shadows

beneath the sun.

 

You’ve seen me in wrinkles,

or ink that seeps into your

sweaty palm.

 

A new résumé soon slips

away and crinkles,

translucent and pliant

as snakeskin,

perfect for a pair of

sturdy boots.

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Poetry from The Well

Country Skies

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Open wide, we’re headed to country skies

and snug valleys.

New windows will host midday shadows

across our old rugs.

The air will be crisper than lemon.

Towers of worries will topple over

at the sight of those blues and purples

and pinks escorting the sun down

home behind the mountain.

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Mind

Choices

Yesterday I had a powerful realization. It was one of those moments when a thought flutters down and settles into place and everything makes sense. Sometimes it feels like we learn and relearn the same lessons over and over. Where have all those magic moments of peace gone – the moments when everything felt right in the world? They come and go.

My magic moment yesterday was about having choices. The idea that everything in my life I have chosen. My job, my commute, my friends, the place I’m living, the outfits I’m wearing, the length of my hair, and the giant piece of cake I ate a few hours ago. It sounds silly, but I’m not sure that I have ever felt with such raw certainty that I am in fact steering my own life.

The past several months have been tough. I’ve had a bad bout of anxiety and I’m on the cusp of making several big changes. Being in an anxious state can really dull any real sense of power or control over your life. Also, I believe the more rigid your daily routine is, the harder it is to remember that you have the ability to choose. I could take a different route to work. I could have scrambled eggs for breakfast for a change.

I could even CHOOSE to relax, instead of worry! It sure is hard to relax. But I am choosing to try. I just read Louise Hay’s You Can Heal Your Life – a book I’ve been meaning to read for a while. While I could write a whole book about my reactions to her book (heh), I think the part that stuck with me most is an exercise called “Letting Go.” When I read it, holding the book in my hands, dead tired after a long day, I realized how freaking tense my body and mind were, while believing that I had been relaxing before bed.

While it’s not as simple as deciding: I choose to banish my anxiety forever! Be gone, cursed feelings of doom and paranoia! maybe it can be as simple as focusing on smaller decisions, such as: I choose to relax my muscles and mind tonight, and sink into bed and let go.

Here’s an excerpt from the exercise. Maybe it will help you relax, too! I’ll let you choose whether or not to read Louise Hay’s book. 🙂

“As you read this, take a deep breath and, as you exhale, allow all the tension to leave your body. Let your scalp and your forehead and your face relax. Your head does not need to be tense in order for you to read. Let your tongue and your throat and your shoulders relax. You can hold a book with relaxed arms and hands. Do that now. Let your back and your abdomen and your pelvis relax. Let your breathing be at peace as you relax your legs and feet.

Is there a big change in your body since you began the previous paragraph? Notice how much you hold on. If you are doing it with your body, you are doing it with your mind.”

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